Valentine’s Day is less than a week away. And for many, Valentine’s Day is one of the worst days out there. So why not get your Valentine’s Day-hating friends together for one crazy party. All the disturbing and snarky parts of love, none of the sweetness.
The event should get started with my favorite non-traditional love story:
He Loves Me He Loves Me Not
A French romance film starring Audrey Tautou? May sound too lovey-dovey for you, but I guarantee it’s not. My gentlemen friends still cringe when I bring this movie up; it makes love scary on a psychological level. I promise. Stay with it till the end.
$14.99 at Amazon.com
After a good dose of crazy, release your inner feelings with some homemade ransom Valentines. Make them for each other and then pass them out. Or even better, slip them under the doors of those who couldn’t make the party.
All you need is some construction paper, scissors, glue stick, and the thickest wedding magazine you can find. Bonus points, with a couple markers you can go to town making zombie brides!
Just because your guests are single for Valentine’s Day doesn’t mean they don’t deserve gifts. Just stay away from anything too romantic.
Show them you care with an anatomically correct gummy heart (complete with gummy blood). Take a bit of extra time to wrap it up in a nice box, they’ll never know what’s coming.
$6.99 at ThinkGeek.com
Do you love the chalky taste of conversation hearts, but hate the sayings? Find something a bit more appropriate in this container of Bittersweets.
$9.95 at Despair.com
Want to get a bit more crafty with your treats? Try Sprinkle Bake’s Chocolate Cupcakes with Flaming Strawberries:
Fire, alcohol, fruit, and chocolate. Can’t go wrong in my book. Just make sure the true crazies stay away.
What are your plans for Valentine’s Day?